The Great American Apparel Diet

no buying for one year

So I came upon this diet in an unfortunate manner. My friend Alicia, a Queen Anne mom, forwarded me Sally’s initial blog with a joking comment reading, “I’d rather go on a hunger strike than stop shopping. Hmmm. Maybe that would be a good idea BEFORE shopping!” or words to that effect. I love Alicia. She always thinks outside of the box.

It was a few days into September but since I hadn’t shopped since some time in August (amazing, I know, but true.) I figured that it was legit and necessary for me to join. Yeah, yeah…I am getting to the running shorts.

I think some of you gals were more prepared for this than I was. There was no preparatory shopping on my end so I didn’t realize what the running short situation was. The other reason I knew not how grim my supply was is that this summer was summed up as, “The summer of the gut.” Apparently I hadn’t really looked at my exercise stuff since June.

Now, I know we can’t publish a list of the things we would like other people to buy us and I am not interested in anyone spending a penny but……I am wondering if any of my fellow bloggers have any running shorts out there in the universe that they hate/don’t fit/otherwise have no need for. Here’s a link for the style that fits my good, old, Irish, potato picking legs and cankles–www.teamexpress.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId=8698&code=TEAMXWEBGE040001&cm_mmc=Google_Base-_-Team-_-Products%20Link-_-ARPS-T783

I am really curious to see how this goes. I figure it’ll go one of a few ways. No one will ever read this and I’ll still be sitting her typing to myself in eleven months time. No downside to that, it’s what I’d likely be doing anyway. I think, however, it’s possible I’ll get inundated with everyone’s cast off running shorts which, if they cover my cellulite while I am trolling around the pull up bars at the beach (pretending to work out while ogling all of the HOT twenty-something guys and feeling like a middle-aged, beer bellied dude scratching his privates) I’ll be happy as a clam!

Is this cheating or is it re-purposing things that would otherwise be sitting dormant? I haven’t decided. If I was cheating, I’d go straight for the little workout skort that has the lycra shorts underneath (not even the hint of a camel toe with that skirt on baby!) and call it a day but I am not going to. I can wait eleven months for the cute skort. I can even survive a year in my two pairs of shorts while I give the evil eye to the hooker MILFS at the gym wearing all of the new Lululemon and Lucy. I could look Bud and Rip (aforementioned twenty somethings at beach) straight in the abs while wearing the same shorts over and over again. I’ll simply rest quietly in the knowledge that I haven’t spent a small country’s GDP on workout gear this year and you know, I feel better about it already.

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