Me in a formerly "too small" dress from my attic!
Well, I’ve been quite busy, so it’s taken me awhile to get around to writing this confessional… er, I mean, entry… but here it is:
I bought some clothes.
Yep, folks, I fell off the TGAAD wagon… actually, I jumped off it quite deliberately, but I can explain:
Many of you know that I’ve lost over 22 pounds over the last 6 months. It was hard work and I’m proud of my accomplishment. I’m also proud of the fact that – with the help of several belts, hand-me-downs from friends, and the timely discovery of a bin of clothing labeled “Cathy – too small” in my attic – I’ve remained true to my TGAAD commitment this entire time.
However, when I recently landed a part-time job (after being primarily a full-time stay-at-home mom for 11+ years), I knew some clothing purchases were on my shopping horizon. I work mostly from home, but when I do need to go into “the office”, I’m with CEO’s and C-suite executives of major Manhattan corporations. At those times, the dress code is “current & corporate”. The few businessy items I still own that are even REMOTELY corporate positively scream, “I love the 80’s!” (think boxy with big shoulder pads), and just aren’t going to cut it!
SOOO, I quite intentionally took a little trip to a local off price women’s clothing store for the purpose of picking out a few “must have’s” for my new job. In my mind, these included a skirt suit, a pants suit, a couple of business blouses, and an additional business skirt or dress. Really not excessive, I thought.
On the one hand, I felt guilty shopping for clothes while on TGAAD, but there were many facets of the experience I enjoyed: surveying the many colorful racks of apparel, feeling the various fabrics and textures as I thumbed through the hangers of clothes, lugging loads of items into the dressing room, trying on clothes I thought would fit only to find I was now a size smaller than I believed. The only unpleasant part of my trip was the bingey sensation I had trying on loads of clothes after being on this clothing fast for so long. With dozens of items in that dressing room, it was like being on a clothing pig-out!
Once I narrowed my dozens of potential items down to 8 pieces of apparel, I floated on cloud nine over to the register. However, that’s when my mood changed. With each swipe of that bar code reader across my apparel tags, my bliss decreased while my tab increased. The thrill I’d experienced in the dressing room dissipated and uncertainty crept in, “Do I really need THAT?”, “Can’t I make do with just THOSE?” After having scrimped through 12 months of my husband’s unemployment, the number at the bottom of my receipt seemed huge. I left the store with garment bags over my shoulder and doubts swirling in my head.
Once home, I laid my new items of apparel out on my bed and took a long, critical look at them. Those “must have’s” now seemed excessive and self-indulgent. Yes, I needed clothes for work, but I didn’t really need that many, I just WANTED them. Prior to losing weight, I’d been “dressing room averse” for awhile. But, with my new svelte figure, I was like a kid in a candy store and got a tad carried away.
With a guilty conscience, I scoured my closet yet again for any apparel that could possibly replace some of the pieces I’d bought. There was nothing in my closet but, at the very bottom of the clothing bin from my attic, I did uncover a passable pencil skirt, a businessy blouse and 2 pairs of businessy slacks. SOOO, with that, I decided to go back to the store and make a few returns. After having “binged” on all that clothing, the returns felt much like the concomitant purge, but I was happy to let them go.
I still own a lovely Tahari two-toned skirt suit, a work blazer, and a lovely asymmetrical neckline blouse (that can do double duty for evenings out), but the rest of my purchases ended up back at the store awaiting a home in someone else’s closet. Depending on my new work schedule, I may still need a few more pieces of work clothing before TGAAD ends on September 1st. However, I’ve vowed not to cross any more clothing bridges until I get to them!
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Tagged with: Apparel Diet, cheating, clothes, clothing diet, shopping, TGAAD, The Great American Apparel Diet
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