The Great American Apparel Diet

no buying for one year

I loved reading Angeline’s post chronicling her shopping eras–totally identified with each one–and got stuck reading over and over again the question she posed:  “how much is enough?”  Like most of you, I am able to participate in TGAAD precisely because I have not properly answered this question in the past and have gone way past “enough,” which allows me to diet–without cheating even once I am proud to say–without suffering the hardship of not having something to wear.  I always do!

But what happens when you spill toxics on your favorite duds, or your essential Converse wear a hole in them?  Over time, if we all stayed on TGAAD forever we would end up naked or in rags, and obviously neither are acceptable solutions for us fashion forward ladies (and gentleman!), our friends, families, and employers.   

So I am trying to envision post-TGAAD life, and how I am going to take lessons learned from this experience and change my relationship with clothes/shoes/accessories going forward.  Personally, I’d like to focus on my clothes as a tool to accomplish my life goals, and get away from using shopping as an addictive treat.  I’d love to see a standard set of rules or guidelines that I can live by for “how much is enough” that can be customized depending on needs and lifestyle.  Then you know right away if you need to go shopping, and what specifically you need to buy.  It would take all the wasted time and money out of shopping.  My initial thoughts are that maybe the list should be one outfit for each day of the week that you do an activity:

office job (5 days a week) = five each of mix and match pants, shirts, sweaters

swim (1 day a week) = one swimsuit

etc. etc. 

Any takers?  Anyone want to post a proposed set of rules for “enough”?

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I did not realize how much I am addicted to shopping for new clothes until I officially took this challenge. But I have been sticking through it, one day and shopping mall at a time.  Going to the mall without buying a new article of clothing required new level of impulse control. Ever since I gave up new clothes, I have been noticing a lot more accessories that really spice up the outfit that I already have. For example, the below shrug/bolero and necklace in this picture cost me $15 total:

My only scare at the moment is finding myself getting addicted to buying accessories from now.  That would defeat the whole purpose of giving up buying new clothes if I trade them with jewelry, shoes, scarves and belts.  Lord help me.  I am a harm to myself.

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Friends,
This is what I have learned. Austerity does not bring out the best in me for diets. For me austerity means STRICT self control. Hmmmm. I have self control in most of my life, maybe a bit too much sometimes.
I am on a detox healthy eating plan right now, but I still allow myself two Dove candies a day. Maybe that is the secret – restraint, but not austerity, with clothes shopping. That’s my most recent learning. Thanks for listening.
Brenda aka Cookie

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Okay, It’s been a week since I last checked in and I must admit that last week was tough. I accomplished something that was really great and I so badly wanted to buy myself a new outfit. I survived. I didn’t make my celebratory appearance at White House/Black Market; instead I found another way to celebrate. I just shared my accomplishment with family and friends and that seem to have done the trick. I know, I know, I could have bought a new accessory because that’s allowed but I didn’t because I definitely can over indulge in jewelry, shoes and belts. Trust me I own my share of anything and everything that can make an outfit “pop”. Oh by the way, did I tell you that jewelry and sandals is another problem for me??? Probably not! Well let me tell you I used to sell silver jewelry and I started collecting and selling vintage jewelry but that quickly came to an end. Thank God! How much jewelry do I need? In my mind I can never have enough. However, in my husband’s mind, I definitely have enough.

Not a whole lot going on but I just wanted to let you ladies and gentlemen know that this newbie is hanging in there!

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Dilemma: I spilled some noxious chemical last week (too much to get into here, no bodily injuries were sustained). However, I got it on my clothes, some of my FAVORITE clothes. Nothing terribly fabulous or lovely, but I wear them all the time – Prana yoga pants, SmartWool sweater (can you say “machine washable wool?”) and my BearPaw boots. Like I said, nothing terribly special, I mean BearPaws are Ugg wannabes!

This is KILLING me. Do I replace? Do I sacrifice and go without? Just where does damaged clothing due to a toxic spill fit into this whole gig? Isn’t the whole point to sacrifice?!?

I am very committed to this whole she-bang and have not cheated or even thought of cheating (so far).

So, I haven’t decided what to do. (I should mention that when I signed up, I opted to include shoes in my sacrifice. Seemed like the right thing to do at the time. But I’m not so sure anymore.)

Part of me is seeking blessings and approvals from you all, but part of me needs to just figure it out on my own. Just where do I stand on giving myself permission to “cheat” because of this loss I feel for something as materialistic as clothing? Or am I making too much out of this?

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It’s only been a week since I officially joined the diet, but this weekend was the first time I’d gone to a store that sold clothes since I started.  It was difficult to watch my friends try on and purchase clothes, but they were super-supportive of my decision to not shop for clothes and didn’t try to tempt me or anything.

I did make out with a great accessory buy, however — a skinny red-orange belt, which I’ve worn every day since I bought it in different ways.  Over a cardigan, with wide-leg trousers, over a tunic-y blouse.  For only $10, I know this accessory will help spruce up many outfits in my closet and give them new life over this next year.

Do you have a favorite accessory that just “makes” an outfit?

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For some reason, I haven’t been to the blog for a while…not because I’ve sinned and was afraid to admit it (I haven’t – tho I keep getting tempted by my beloved girls, who constantly take me shopping, show me beautiful clothes and even make me try out some, ‘just to see what it looks like’), but because I just didn’t feel like I have anything to say, to add; I would still follow other ladies’ posts on my GoogleReader, always thinking how I should comment, give praise, share my experiences so far – but the inspiration for a new post was just not there…Until now, when I landed on the site almost by accident, and my eyes spotted the little coffee mug in the corner, and something with a familiar word – recession – written next to it.

Recession, you say? How has recession influenced my life, and thus also my apparel diet? The life part – well, that would take too much time to tell; but as for the diet is concerned…I have, truth be told, never been much of an economist, but it didn’t take me much to add two and two together, and pinpoint the influences it has had on my dieting experience so far. It may not have been the cause of it (strangely enough, when I started the diet, I saw my financial issues as only a ‘temporary setback’), but in a way it has made it short-term sustainable, given the fact that I have not only been determined not to shop for clothes recently – I was also disabled from doing so, because recession means less jobs, and less jobs means no job for me at the moment, and that also comes down to no dresses and shoes, not even to mention the bags!

But truth be told, there has also been a long-term, positive influence of the recession created. Sure, at the moment I cannot buy things, even if I would want to, which I don’t. But precisely the fact that I can’t do something, or that I shouldn’t and would probably feel a bit guilty for spending the money, scarcer than usual, on things I necessarily don’t need if I did, also made me realize something for sure – I totally CAN live like this. And if one day living like this would become a matter of not choice, but need, a result of a set of circumstances that I am barely capable of doing anything about, I would not necessarily be unhappy about it – as I always suspected I would. True, a part of me will always crave for a nice apartment, some designer furniture (not as a show-off, but because I do get impressed by concepts sometimes – and while I am no expert on design or art, I do fall in love with, for instance, the Campana brothers’ work over and over again, and would love to own a piece of such a great world of ideas someday for sure!) and the ability to afford gorgeous little things – but the feeling of emptiness, even sadness that I thought might appear when looking at the latest Bernhard Willhelm dresses or Ann  Demeulemeester boots (and those too are really great pieces of contemporary design, not just simple ‘clothes’, but real concepts) that I can not or will not be able to afford, is just not there. It isn’t. And that feels surprisingly great, and is a good sign – I might be even less a victim of the habit of shopping than I thought!

P.S. All the real tests have been passed successfully: still receiving online announcements about fav stores getting re-stocks of gorgeous things, but I just don’t care; checked out the Asos offer of dresses the other day, and among literally a thousand dresses, only one caught my attention, and I gave up on that one quite easily too. There is only one test left, the cheap one: going to H&M this weekend; and if I survive without consequences (or only with a pair of shoes, since I really am low on those – tho I would rather avoid that too), I shall be very happy.

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Just 3 years ago I was a lot thinner and in better shape. For whatever reason + some chronic health issues, I have put on weight and not been able to work out as regularly as I once did. I’m not feeling too great about the body just now, so NOT buying clothes is not a huge sacrifice for me.

Anyway, I have been able to start a bit of a downward trend in the weight the last few months. I don’t know exactly what the numbers are because the scale scares me. I go by what fits. All I know is that 4 years ago I was in sizes 8-10 and for about the past year I have been pushing a 14 and not happy at all about “more of me”.

Anyway, I have been trying to be more careful about portions and type of food consumed. Still not great about the exercise, but the food part is coming along. I have noticed the size I’ve grown into in the last year has been feeling looser lately.

So, this morning I risked my ego and pulled out a pair of hardly worn jeans from thinner days and tried them on.

They FIT!!!! I could zip them without having to lay flat on the floor and button them without it popping open. I can’t tell you how excited I am over this!!!! I have a whole SECTION of my closet in this size and will look forward to being able to visit some old friends.

I still have a ways to go. ( A long way…) But this small surprise today is real inspiration. If I can get back into my former size, I could probably do TGAAD for at least another year.

I have several big events coming up, all to do with my baby’s high school graduation and the thought of being able to maybe wear some of my pretty dresses is making me positively giddy!

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You see, the hole in the heel of my Converse started small. It was one of those little, nagging things that doesn’t bother you much in the beginning, like a small thread dangling from your shirt hem. However, after a few months the hole expanded, overtaking the tattered heel of my shoe. The laces loosened and lost their taut strength, and the soles cracked beyond repair. Now I realize I need to buy new shoes, even if I avoid it like the plague.

At first I was completely resistant to the idea of any new clothing. “Absolutely NO handbags, NO accessories, and definitely NO shoes,” I exclaimed in manifesto. But realizing my sole pair of sneakers were on their last leg (pun totally intended), I wrote them into my personal apparel diet rule-book: “One pair of shoes may come in if another goes out”.

Of course, I really didn’t understand the state of affairs in my closet in January the same way I do now. I’ve never been a shoe or bag hoarder. In fact, at this moment I possess three pairs of heels, a pair of flat knee-high boots, and my dying Converse. Upon making this realization, I felt like a bewildered animal who just noticed she hasn’t saved enough food to make it through the winter and realized if I was going to make it through the year, through the rain and snow, I was going to need to buy shoes.

Now I’ve gone and made my purchases, and though it may have taken me more than a month (and a little more money than I would like to spend) to find the perfect pair of walking shoes, I’ve learned a couple new facts in the process. Flat-soled shoes, along with courier bags, are not clothing, they’re school supplies, and taking time to focus on quality is going to carry me a lot further than being a cheapskate in denial. In fact, if I’m going to walk my campus and neighborhood through the seasons without the shoes wearing away from my very feet, I’m going to have to acknowledge my needs when they arise without resorting to self-deprivation.

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Some people shop because they’re stressed.  Some shop because they are bored.  Others because there is a big event coming up or they’ve fluctuated in size.

Me?  I was literally born to shop.  My life can pretty much be summed up in my shopping habits.

Mom made me do it [Age 0-5]
My wonderful mother did not teach me to cook or drive a stick-shift, but she ingrained in me a passion for shopping from a very VERY young age.  Let’s just say I was a quick study.

I don’t like any of my clothes [Age 6-11]
My rebellious stage started in first grade.  Nothing in my closet was wearable, and I wasn’t a quiet child.

My clothes aren’t trendy enough [Age 12-17]
Junior high and high school.  Boys.  Enough said.

I work, therefore I spend [Age 18-20]
The first couple of years of college were freeing.  I was out on my own and holding down 1-2 part-time jobs at a time.  What should I do with my new income?  Duhhh.   It was quantity over quality.

The Office [Part I] [Age 20-21]
I got my first office job in a small office with only 3 employees including me.  I was beginning to take myself more seriously and preparing for life after graduation.  I needed more “professional” clothes.  Blazers are nice, right?  I’ll get one in hot pink. Nearly nothing from this period is still in my closet.

Regression and Weatherproofing [Age 21-23]
Life after college education ended up being graduate school.  Graduate school across the country.  I needed weather-appropriate clothing.  My internship at a magazine was a jeans and heels/boots kind of shop.  I lived in New York City, shopping mecca.

The Office [Part II] [Age 23-26]
Ah, the real world.  It took me a while to get there, but I finally got myself in an office job.  One that didn’t even have casual Fridays.  I shopped to my heart’s content for three years on the “I need work clothes” excuse.  My income now has to cover both myself and my husband (about 1 year from finishing his Ph.D.), so it’s quality over quantity these days and lots of bargain hunting.

Present
At some point in the last year or so, as I watched my closet slowly fill with office-appropriate and special-event clothing, I wondered how much would be enough?  And would I recognize when I reached that point?

Then it hit me.  I think I have enough. I have a good rotation of work pants, work skirts, work dresses, and even the occasional suit.  I have 9 pairs of jeans, 3 of which can be dressed up for a casual Friday.  I have a supply of wedding-worthy cocktail dresses (and a wedding dress, but I’m pretty sure I won’t need that again).  I have a dressy winter coat, a casual winter parka, and a classic trench.

My evolution as a shopper has honed my skills to an art…so much so that I can say pretty confidently that my closet is fully stocked for just about anything that will come up in the next year or beyond.  The next phase of life, whatever it might be, will carry with it new fashion needs and challenges, but I’ll tackle that when it gets here.

How have you evolved as a shopper?   Are you ready to take on the year fashion-wise or are there areas of your closet that you wish were better prepared?

A closet at the ready

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